Monday, August 4, 2008

You wait 'til next year's chair catalogue comes out and find someone who's still alive

On Saturday, I went to Ikea with one objective: to find new dinnerware. Also, cups. Also, a toothbrush holder. Oh, and also maybe a picture to hang in the living room.

I did not find any of these things. Well, I found some little juice glasses. And some cards with rubber duckie faces on them that cost more than the juice glasses. All in all, I waited in a 900 foot line to buy three things for a grand total of $14.00.

Ikea, I am not impressed. I LOOOOOOOVED Ikea when we went to the one in Schaumberg. I wouldn't shut up about it. Here, let me show you the not shutting up. However, when we went to the Ikea in Schaumberg, I wasn't looking for anything in particular. I just gazed in wonder at the array of household crap laid out before me. This leads me to believe that Ikea is a much more pleasurable experience when you're NOT actually looking for something. Or the Ikea in West Chester just sucks. Either way, I was sort of bummed UNTIL . . .

I realized that we'd be driving through Mason. And Mason is where McAlister's Deli is. I used to get McAlister's all the time when I worked in Mason, but there aren't any of those around Dayton because Dayton hates me. Anyway, I knew it was off a certain exit, but I couldn't remember exactly where it was because I am directionally handicapped. We got off the exit and it went something like this:

Me: I don't think it's on this road.
Joe: OK, we'll find it.
Me: It might be on this whole other road.
Joe: Let's just keep driving.
Me: OK. I don't see it. Hey, there's Ruby Tuesday! "Gooooooodbye, Ruby Tuesday . . ."
Joe: Are those the only words you know?
Me: . . . NO. "Who could something rain on you?"
Joe: Um, no. It's, "who could hang a name on you?"
Me: Whatever. Do you see McAlister's?
Joe: No. Let's drive through this shopping center.
Me: OK. I don't see it. Where is it? I don't see it.
Joe: Do you just want to go to Ruby Tuesday?
Me: Yeah, OK.
Joe: Let me turn around.
Joe: What?
Me: Look! Look! McAlister's! Across the street!
Joe: You scared the crap out of me.
Me: Sorry. BUT LOOK!

Then I got sweet tea and it was good. The end.


You can call me, 'Sir' said...

Joe is a patient man, is he not?

Jennie! said...

Heh. What are you saying, Sir?

You can call me, 'Sir' said...'re pretty and smart?


mysterygirl! said...

I want to see the cards with rubber duckie faces on them! They sound adorable.

Jennie! said...

Sir, nice save. Hee.

mg! They are totally adorable. I want to frame them and hang them in my room.

Sally said...

A of all, it's "SchaumbUrg" - get it right. The people of SchaumBURG would like you to.

B of all, I so sang the entire song to Abigail while on the eastern plains of Colorado while passing a really scary federal prison! Just ask Abigail!

C of all, isn't it wonderful that Abigail listened to the entire song. It's about the only one I know any lyrics to. Awesome chorus.

Oh, and, it was my first 45.

Stephanie said...

You're crazy. Poor Joe. Hee.

Tam said...

i see you are beginning the tag line
"coversations with joe"
I agree. Ikea sucks now that we have one nearby.

Abigail said...

I know you don't mean it when you hate on Ikea.

Jennie! said...

Sally, soooooooorry! I love Schaumburg. Not Schaumberg. Schaumburg.

Stephanie, YOU are the one who is crazy! Hee.

Tam, it just wasn't the same. Also, I didn't find anything I wanted.

Abs, remember about the duckie cards? They were worth the trip.

Ashley said...

I know what you mean about Ikea. It is SO BIG and all I wanted last Saturday were curtains and drawer organizers but it takes at least twenty minutes to not get lost in there. It is a dangerous, dangerous place for people who are domestic and like to spend money. It is a trap. With Swedish meatballs. And pie.

Joe G. said...

You left out the part where I talked about how delicious the turkey burgers at Ruby Tuesday are.

The turkey burgers at Ruby Tuesday? Delicious

Jennie! said...

Ashley, I love to buy all that stuff, but then I never use it. Sort of like how I like to buy organizy stuff but then I'm never organized. Sigh.

Joe, sorry. Everyone! The turkey burgers at Ruby Tuesday are delicious.