This morning I was attacked by a cicada. Yeah. I KNOW. Sure, mostly it just sat there on the ground and buzzed my feet as I walked by, but an attack is an attack. AND THEN I emailed Heidi at work to tell her about it and it turns out the very same cicada attacked her, too! I don't know why this cicada tried to kill both of us. Maybe he was friends with the baby raccoons. Who knows? But someone should have informed him that Heidi called the apartment complex people, not me. Heh.
AND THEN I got in my car to drive to work, because when I try to drive to work without my car, nothing happens. So there I was, wiping leftover sleep from my eyes, and that's when I saw it! A big, fat cicada stuck in my windshield wipers. I thought about turning them on, but I didn't want smooshed cicada guts all over my windshield. That's just not the way I like to start my day, you know? And anyway, right after I thought about smooshing him, he moved! And, while I find these creatures odd and try to avoid them whenever possible (sorry, Kat), I wasn't about to kill an innocent bug just because he got stuck on my car. On the other hand, I wasn't going to get out of my car and flick him off the windshield. Not because I was afraid to touch him, I just didn't feel like getting out of the car. Do you realize how much motivation it takes to get IN the car when I know the car's taking me to work? Yeah.
Since the cicada was alive, I had to give him a name. So Jeff and I drove to work and the whole time I kept thinking, "hang on, little guy, we're almost there!" and you know what? He did hang on. He hung on for the entire ride. I think he actually liked it. I didn't get a change to ask him, because I was running late, but if he's still there after work, I'll ask him and let you guys know.
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11 comments:
Oh my god. I can't wait to hear Jeff's side of the story.
DAMMIT!!
You didn't set him free? You just left him there stuck on the windshield?
Megan, (if that IS your real name) I will let you know as soon as I find out.
Sir, he's the one who chose to get stuck there.
OMG a cicada dive bombed my face the other day, luckily, I shut my mouth just in time and he slammed into my lips. Yes, we kissed. Then after he took advantage of me he just flew away like nothing happened.
I also accidentally stepped on one and the large crunch under my flip flop felt like a mouse. true story.
Great name, the jerk mamma who lived with us two years ago was called Jeff. The one who only ate frozen pizza and italian sausage.
Say Hi to Jeff for me!
If he's still there after work, I'm pretty sure it's because he's stalking you. That, or you took him way out of his way and now he needs a ride home.
Dude I would TOTALLY be afraid to touch it.
I would have abandoned my car on the side of the road if there was a cicada on it. I literally saw the bug, screamed and ran for the car this morning. So traumatizing!
Cicadas are evil. You are so brave.
i'm glad you didn't kill him, jennie.
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