I called my mom yesterday after work because I'd been informed that it'd been FOREVER since she'd spoken to me. FOREVER. Even though I was at home less than two weeks ago for her birthday and I saw her THE VERY NEXT DAY at my grandma's. So, for those counting, FOREVER = about a week and a half (I love you, Mom).
When I talked to her, she was all, "your dad and I figured you were busy," and I said, "oh?" and she said, "yeah, because you never update your blog anymore," and I was all, "yeah, cause they expect me to do actual work at work now PSHAW WHATEVER I DO WHAT I WANT." And then she was like, "you should come over because I have a bunch of kitchen crap you can have." I wonder if there'll be a day when, instead of taking leftover crap that no one wants anymore, I will be the one giving someone leftover crap that I don't want anymore. The day has to come, I think. It's the circle of crap.
I KNOW I've been neglecting you, dear Internets. I'm sorry. Summer is the time for doing stuff, right? And so I've been doing stuff. Stuff like almost killing myself with a guitar and trying to figure out a way to become a runner without actually, you know, running. Also, I've become obsessed with grape soda THROUGH NO FAULT OF MY OWN. Joe suggested we go to Potbelly a couple of weeks ago and I was all, "hmm, they have grape soda . . . I shall try it." And I tried it. And it was good. And then I kept suggesting we go back to Potbelly JUST so I could get more grape soda and then I bought grape soda at Meijer and now I want to drink it all the time, but I'm afraid my teeth might fall out.
Every time I drink it (or, let's face it, talk about it), I have to preface it with, "MMM, GRAPE SO-DA." My friend Nancy once came to a sorority function completely obliterated out of her mind (in the middle of the afternoon, I might add . . . those were the days) and proceeded to pour herself the biggest cup of grape soda known to mankind and womankind and, I don't know, duck-kind. She stuck her gum to the rim, then picked it back up, dipped it in the grape soda, stuck it in her mouth, and shouted, "MMM, GRAPE SO-DA." And then repeated this scenario for the next hour. We knew she was quoting something, but it took us the majority of the night to realize she was quoting Saved by the Bell. Saved by the Bell is sort of like Friends, in that anything that ever happens to you in life can be connected to an episode. True story. For instance, guess what episode was on the other day?
"I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so . . . so SCAAAAARED." It was just like that time I got addicted to caffeine pills because I had a geometry test and my friends and I were in a girl band and I wanted to get into Stanford.