Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I AM SOFA KING NERVOUS

Hi, Internets. Did you vote yet? I hope so. Even if you voted for the wrong person (hee), I think it's important that you vote. At least then you can complain for the next four years if your candidate loses. Hell, you can complain for the next four years if your candidate wins. That's what's beautiful about this country -- you can complain as long and as loudly as you want and no one gives a shit. Hee.

I wish I'd gone to vote early this morning, because then I could be drinking free Starbucks right now. But that would have meant I needed to get up even earlier than I do already, and that thought makes me want to cry. So I'll go at lunch, and if there's a long line and I have to miss work, so be it. It's the least I can do for my country. Actually, the least I could do for my country would be to NOT vote, but again . . . see above, re: complaining.

Heidi and I ended up tossing out the "watching the returns from a bar" plan when I suggested we just make chili and invite people over. Dude, people love chili. Also, beer. And cornbread! Mmm, cornbread. I wish it was time for chili now because that would mean I'd already voted, work was over, and it was time for the results to start coming in.

We made the chili last night and it looks so good. I wish I could invite you guys over. I mean, if you want to travel all the way to Ohio, then go for it. The more the merrier. You know, just bring extra booze because we only have so much of it and I know how much some of you can drink. Heh. Heidi went to the grocery last night to buy another can of beans, because we were worried we wouldn't have enough, and while she was gone, I decided to dice the onion. First I had to Google "how to dice an onion," NOT that I couldn't have figured it out on my own, but I like to follow directions. That's a lie. I had no idea how to dice an onion, other than to start chopping the shit out of it with a knife. I had to take a couple breaks because it was making me CRY, CRY, CRY, sort of like how I cried four years ago when W was reelected. Once the crying stopped, my friend Katie called me from DC and the conversation went something like this:

Her: Hey.
Me: Hey. What are you doing?
Her: Oh, you know. I'm just standing in front of the White House. Staring.
Me: Yeah.
Her: The Metro was really quiet today.
Me: I'll bet.
Her: This sucks.
Me: Yeah. I'm gonna go back to sleep.
Her: OK.
Me: ...
Her: ...

It was a depressing day, is what I'm saying. Also, I live blogged the election last time. I might do it again this year. If I remember. Heidi, will you remind me? You know how my brain forgets things. It can be the "Jennie and Heidi live-blog the election show." We'll be famous. FAMOUSER. Anyway, where was I? Oh, right. Onions. They were making me cry. And when Heidi came home, she was all, "holy lord, it smells like an onion exploded in here," and she was right. Even this morning it still smelled like onions, despite the fact that I ran through the apartment spraying Oust everywhere and lighting candles and opening windows. Damn, Gina.

Last night, I also did the 30 Day Shred video again and didn't want to die quite as much as I did the first time. And I'm not as sore today as I was before, so . . . yay. And then I watched like four episodes of Lost because did you know they show it on Sci-fi now? Awesome. It still doesn't make any sense, but that's why I love that show. Also, Matthew Fox is hot, even though Jack is really annoying. My favorite one that was on last night was the one where Hurley is in charge of the food, and he gives it all away in the end and it totally made me cry. Or maybe it was just the onion.

8 comments:

kat! said...

you know, if you came to the thanksgiving miracle early enough to actually help prepare the food instead of just showing up around dinner time, i TOTALLY would have showed you how to dice an onion.

also, matthew fox is hot yes indeed.

Jennie! said...

Hey, I helped peel potatoes!

Hee.

vahid said...

you know, you're right: there's nothing more all-American than complaining.

Jennie! said...

I am totally all-American, then.

Tam said...

onions are the devil - that's why you get an incredible husband to chop them for you!

Yay FANTASTIC TURKEY CHILI don't forget the fritos!

Jennie! said...

Next time I will call him to chop the onion.

S said...

Oh lordy, I totally am craving chili now. I already planned to make a homemade pizza tonight (why I'm not just ordering it though, I don't know, considering the pizza place is closer to my house than the polls are, and I actually walked to vote this morning). But I'm thinking tomorrow night, yeah, I could definitely make some chili.

Thanks for the excellent dinner plan.

Tam said...

I need to shred my muscles too, then people can call us "Shredder" like on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.