Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I think green is kind of whorish.

It was poor planning on my part (story of my life) that led to me running frantically around Meijer at ten o'clock last night holding onto an ice cream cake FOR DEAR LIFE. After volunteering, where we ran out of pizza because HOLY HELL growing boys eat a lot, I ran through Wendy's, went home and ate it, and then remembered that I was in charge of a birthday luncheon today. Eff. I went to Kroger to buy chicken salad and an ice cream cake but Kroger didn't have any ice cream cake. By this time, Dairy Queen was closed and I thought about going to Coldstone, but I couldn't remember if they were open and to be honest? I don't like my coworkers enough to get them an ice cream cake from Coldstone. So off to Meijer I went. I said a little prayer as I walked toward the bakery and cursed the birthday girl for wanting an ice cream cake. Didn't she know I'd wait until the last minute, when no places that sell all sorts of ice cream cakes would be open? At least if she'd picked like . . . chocolate cake, I could have (theoretically) baked it myself. But an ice cream cake? I can barely get ice cream out of the carton without spilling it all over myself, so making an ice cream cake was out of the question.

By the time I got home and put all the groceries away, I barely had the energy to put on my pajamas and flop into bed to catch the tail end of The Office (I heart you, TBS). Surprisingly, I fell asleep right away and didn't wake up until the geese started honking outside this morning. "I wonder why it sounds like they're right next to my window," I thought, and the answer is because they WERE right next to my window. As I walked out to my car, I noticed one of the geese on the roof, honking at a goose on the ground. I think they were either playing King of the Mountain or Red Light/Green Light. Maybe Simon Says. Mother May I?

This has been a long, hard (heh) week and I don't really know why, but I do know if the geese don't STFU already, I'm buying a BB gun.

9 comments:

Cousin Candice said...

oh noes! one of the tags is worst day ever week. boooo

Grad School Reject said...

I can't believe you live within such close proximity to a Dairy Queen and a Coldstone. I would probably fat out of my job if I lived that close to such delicious delicious ice-cream/cake/sundae factories.

Jennie! said...

Candice, I know! But maybe this week will shape up?

GSR, and the Coldstone is within WALKING DISTANCE. I suppose the Dairy Queen technically is, too, but I'd never walk there.

matt said...

Geese are the direct spawn of Satan. All they ever do is poop and make a lot of noise.

But that's most babies, isn't it?

Jennie! said...

True. But at least goslings are cute. Some human babies are way ugly.

heather! anne! said...

I used to think geese honking was the worst noise to ever wake up to. And then I got a Beagle puppy.

Cousin Candice said...

O. M. G. You guys. This afternoon - I was ATTACKED. It was insane. I have never shouted Holy Shit so loudly in public before. You know how you jump when you're startled... I did it like three times in a row - like a mini seizure. I think they flew down and over from Ohio. Damn Geese.

vahid said...

Geese do respond to kindness, you know. You can leave them some treats, and then they'll mellow out and wander over and be all, "dude, this is pretty sweet." And THEN you can whip out your BB gun and be all, "paybacks, suckas!" Just a thought.

Jennie! said...

h!a! but she's so cute!

Candice! I hope you're OK . . . those geese, they are bitches.

Vahid, I'm totally trying that, just as soon as I get a BB gun.