Monday, January 19, 2009

don't you be a traffic light

Did you know that today is the most depressing day of the year? Not only that, apparently it's the most depressing day in ALL OF HISTORY. Which, you know, OK? I don't really buy that. Most depressing day of the year -- I'll give you that. It's cold, it's gloomy, blah blah Christmas credit card bills are due, blah blah something something, but they're trying to say that, in all of history, today is the MOST DEPRESSING DAY EVER? I'm all for hyperbole, Britain, but I have to call shenanigans on this one. Maybe they're trying some sort of reverse psychology or something. They're all, "Hmm, let us TELL everyone today is the most depressing day in all of history and then when it's not so bad, people will be HAPPY. Or pissed. But mostly HAPPY." Tricky Brits.

I don't feel particularly depressed today, although it IS flipping cold and I am at work, but so far it feels about the same as any other cold January workday. I feel pretty energetic actually. I've been getting up early every other morning to let Jillian Michaels try and kill me and I'm sorry to say that it has actually been pretty beneficial. Sure, my knee hurts like hell and it means less sleep, but I'm all ALERT at work, which hardly ever happens. Not only that, but I'm even more productive than usual. Earlier, I could hardly even sit still in my chair and sure, I could blame it on The Ting Tings or the two giant cups of coffee I drank this morning, but I prefer to give the credit to Jillian. Mostly because I'm afraid if I don't, she'll hunt me down and make me do walking push-ups until my arms fall off. And I need my arms. I use them almost every day.

So, this morning, while I was being productive (obviously), I ran across this article: How to Avoid Wasting Time on Facebook. To me, this seems ridiculous, because what is Facebook FOR, if not for wasting time. The article offers such helpful advice as "bring a timer with you to the computer." Um, what? Don't ever do that. You will get made fun of. Loser. It also says to avoid games, maybe because the author of this article has never had the joy of playing Scrabulous Wordscraper. Or they hate life. Either way, as a former how-to-article-writer, all I have to say is FOR SHAME, Mr./Ms. Article Writer. You do a disservice to all Internet time-wasters. Good day.

I SAID GOOD DAY.

12 comments:

Tam said...

I can't do the shredder anymore because it hurts my knees so bad... Boo Jillian Boo.

Tam said...

Oh and p.s. I'm at home wasting time on facebook and NOT at work. Because of the holiday mostly, but I have to work at the gym tonight which means I have to get my fitness on. Good.thing.

mysterygirl! said...

What are walking push-ups? They sound terrifying.

Abigail said...

What pound weights do you use? Cause I have eights and I can't finish the workout. Please rescue me.

Jennie! said...

Tam, if I had today off, that's what I'd be doing, too.

mg!, well. You start standing up, then touch your toes, put your hands on the floor, walk your hands out until you're in a push-up position, do a push-up, walk your hands back to your toes, touch your toes, stand back up, repeat until you die.

Abs, are you crazy? Use 3 or 5 pound weights! Hee. I find 3 pounds works for most exercises, but for some, the 3s are too easy.

Jennie! said...

PS: I'm weak, Abs.

S said...

I'm so glad that I can't do real exercise for 6 more months. My doctor wants me to walk down the street for 10 minutes a day. I'm all about that. I can do that no problem.

Meanwhile, um, I'm sure my dad will be thrilled to find out his birthday is the most depressing day of all time. He'll be psyched. (I do call him "Debbie Downer" so I guess it might be appropriate.)

Tam said...

I just beat all J's records on the Wii fit.. YAY DAY OFF.

Jennie! said...

S, I wish my doctor would prescribe something similar.

Tam, then I'd say today is a definite success.

eclectic said...

See I don't see how my daughter's birthday + MLK Day + a day off from school and work could possibly be the most depressing day ever. In fact, I think the most depressing day ever was in October when I woke up thinking that W had purchased a 3rd term in office. Bad dreams depress me.

Abigail said...

So, there are $2 weights in the target dollar aisle. Should I get those?

Jennie! said...

Shari, that is the worst dream I've ever heard.

Abs, YES.