Wednesday, July 2, 2008

F-O-X

The greatest thing ever happened to me last night. EVER. It was amazing. After $1 burgers and $2 drafts at Bar Louie last night, Nancy dropped a bombshell. I don't remember what we were talking about, but at some point she nonchalanted, "oh, I bought Rock Band."

We were all HOLD THE PHONE (what?). Nancy bought Rock Band? Nancy bought Rock Band. For Wii. Unfortunately, it was still in the box, but once we got to Nancy's, we made quick work of that. The drums are white for Wii Rock Band, unlike the black drums for XBox (is it XBox?) because Wii is racist. Trust me. Just play Rayman and keep your eye out for all the sleeping Mexicans. I wish I was kidding BUT I'M NOT.

Aaaaaaanyway, once the game was set up and I'd put the game disc in the right way (harder than it sounds), the band tour started, with Heidi on bass. At which point this happened, and made me the happiest girl in all the land:

Heidi: It's not working . . . seriously, why isn't it showing that I hit the right color?
Me: Is the guitar on?
Heidi: Yeah!
Me: I dunno then.
Heidi: IT'S NOT WORKING. WHAT THE HELL? ARRRRRRG!
Nancy: That's weird.
Heidi: I'm hitting the right color, WHY ISN'T IT SHOWING THAT I HIT IT?
Nancy: Um, are you strumming?
Heidi: . . . no?
All: BWAAHAAHAAHAAAA!

Seriously, you guys, I don't think I've ever laughed so hard EVER EVER IN MY LIFE. Ahem. I love you, Heidi.

This morning, when I left for work, I looked in the little patch of grass next to our steps and noticed something odd. Two 40s hanging out together, because apparently I'm back at Wittenberg. I think some college kids moved into the apartment next to us. This annoys me. Now that I'm not longer in college, I find most college students and the activities they participate in to be extremely annoying. I'm all, "you kids get off my lawn!" You know. Stuff like that. It's not that I no longer like to go out and act all crazy (see: Thanksgiving Miracle, Philadelphia, St. Patrick's Day, every trip to Chicago ever, tonight's bachelorette party (probably)), it's just that the times I do go out act like a booze-soaked psychopath are few and far between. Not because I don't like to drink anymore (heh), but because I'd rather sit at home in my pajamas and drink while watching a movie or playing Wii or whatever. I'm simple. I don't like wearing real pants, what can I say?

I don't know where I was going with that. Let's move on, shall we?

I went running the other night for the first time in like a week, because I SUCK, and as I was running, I noticed a little girl tottering down the driveway a few houses in front of me. She was about two or three (I don't know), and as she walked onto the sidewalk, going the same direction I was running, her mom, about 87 months pregnant, waddled after her.

Waddler:
Come back, sweetie!
Runaway Girl: Heeheeheehee!

I kept running and eventually caught up to the little girl.

Runaway: Hi!
Me: Hello!
Runaway: Hi!
Me: . . . hi!
Runaway: I'm going to run with you.
Me: OK!

So then she started running after me. Away from her mother. This child was chasing me! CHASING ME! What if it followed me home and never left? I think that's how it happens. So, when I noticed she wasn't stopping and that her mother couldn't really run after her, I turned around and ran back toward her house.

Me: Let's run this way now!
Runaway: OK!
Me: Good job! Keep going!
Runaway: Hi, mommy!

And that's when her mom grabbed her and the runaway started crying. I totally tricked her, which is sort of comforting because sometimes I get worried that I might be stupider than a toddler.

11 comments:

kat! said...

so did they change the menu at your bar louie? because they radically changed the menu at my bar louie.

Jennie! said...

Not that I noticed, but I didn't really look at it because for $1 you just fill out a little worksheet thingie. They did, however, raise the price of their tots and fries.

heather! anne! said...

It's weird that that little girl's parents named her Runaway. It seems like that's just asking for trouble.

Jennie! said...

I know, why would they tempt fate that way? Then again, they did have children, maybe even on purpose, so how smart can they be? Heehee.

eclectic said...

Y'know, we force people to keep their dogs on leashes for that very reason. But, in the child's defense, if you ran past me, I'd probably want to chase you, too. The difference is I probably wouldn't be able to keep up with you. I hate running.

mysterygirl! said...

I want a dollar burger and a two dollar draft! And to play Rock Band, although I played Guitar Hero for the first time last week and I'm not very good at it, especially considering that I can sort of play a real guitar.

You're totally smarter than a toddler. You think they're the ones leaving 40s in your lawn?

Jennie! said...

Shari, you could probably catch me just walking. I'm slow. In more ways than one.

mg! now I'm thinking of a toddler carrying around a 40 and I can't stop laughing.

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

...I get worried that I might be stupider than a toddler.

Dumber, Jennie! You might be dumber than a toddler.

My work here is done.

Ashley said...

Do you think there's an official place where we can petition to change the rules of business dress so that pajamas are mandatory? Would congress be the place for that? We should look into this.

Steve-O said...

Have you ever heard of the band "Roxanne"?

Fraulein N said...

Tricking small children's my favorite.